I don’t know about you, but I absolutely detest deliberately ambiguous Facebook status updates. According to Urban Dictionary there is a phrase for it: vague booking which is described thus:
An intentionally vague Facebook status update that prompts friends to ask what’s going on, or is possibly a cry for help.
However much I like my Facebook friend, to see them post a status such as ‘I’ve had enough’ without further qualification has me both irritated and intrigued in equal measure, so of course I have to post the obligatory, ‘What’s up hon?’ along with their other five-hundred close friends, at which point, when we’ve all become worried something terrible has happened, started clogging their timeline with pictures of kittens doing press-ups saying, ‘Stay Strong!’ and frantically firing off private messages promising that we will always be there for her, it emerges that our friend has completely lost it that YET AGAIN, despite instructions (verbal and stuck to the wall above the recycling bin) one of the male junior members of the household has put plastic bags in the recycling bin so the bin men have refused to take the bin and plastered it with a Sticker of Shame. OK, so I’ll put my hands up to let you know that deranged bin woman is me, but not the Vaguebook status, though I have, on occasions, been guilty of the odd wishy-washy post. But generally, that’s not me, so I apologise right now that this post is vague, though not deliberately so, but only because I’m too tired and strung out to go into details, which of course makes me guilty of the blog equivalent of Vaguebooking.
When things go wrong in my life, broadly speaking, my first reaction is to shut down, hide, refuse to answer the phone or emails and lie on the sofa watching trashy telly with a packet of Mr Kipling Almond Slices resting on my tummy. It’s five years ago this Saturday since JS drowned whilst we were on holiday in Barbados, and much of the weeks afterwards was spent ‘watching’ Two and a Half Men in a state of terror surrounded by cake crumbs.
Things have been difficult here since just after Christmas, and it continues to be an anxious and challenging time. I’m sorry for my vagueness. I’m not keeping anything secret, it’s just that I can’t yet write about what is happening because I don’t know the outcome, and I can’t bring myself to put fingers to keyboard. In my mind, it’s all too frightening at the moment. I’m at the ‘hiding’ stage, but now I’m watching endless episodes of Say Yes to The Dress and going way over the top about plastic bags in the wrong bins.
A very famous blogger with millions of followers once advised that bloggers should never explain to their readers why there has been a break in their blogging; apparently you should just put a new post up and seamlessly continue without qualification or comment, and never ever do a post saying, ‘Back soon’. A ‘Back Soon’ post is lazy and tacky, a bit like me lying on the sofa watching Say Yes To The Dress.